Words Matter

Participating in the 7 Habits training that goes along with the Leader in Me program we're implementing in my school has been life changing for me. While I have grown a lot this summer, putting these seven habits into practice has really been the icing on the cake of 4 long years of growth. I would say that the biggest change I've noticed in myself comes in terms of Habit 1: Be Proactive and Habit 5: Seek First to Understand, then to be Understood.

I know in the past there were days when I let my emotions get the best of me. I'm sure anybody who is a teacher can say that, or anybody who's a parent, or anybody who has to deal with any other human being if you want to be honest. We all have had those times where we have snapped at somebody for no good reason, we've yelled at somebody when they really weren't the person who caused our anger in the first place, or we've said or done things when our emotions were high that we looked back later and regretted.

I'm not sure why it took a 2 day training for me to stop and think about how these negative interactions were affecting the people around me, especially my students.

I'm not sure why it took a 2 day training for me to realize that the kids didn't deserve it when I snapped or was angry; they didn't make me do it.

It was all me. It was my choice.

That's kind of a crappy realization, and yet it's also a really powerful realization.

Having that a-ha moment has allowed me to be proactive when my students have me feeling a little frustrated. I'll actually tell them that I need to take a moment so that I don't respond in a reactive way. (What better way to teach them the habits than to model them myself, right?) I ask them to help me think about why I'm feeling that way. Both of these have helped me handle situations where I might have responded by yelling or snapping in a more proactive manner, and I feel like it has helped my classroom community be even healthier than I thought it was in the past.

The other thing I'm doing, instead of instantly blaming a child for their behaviors, is taking a minute to have a conversation that starts with one of these two phrases:

• Can you help me understand why you are (insert whatever it is the child was doing)?
• You look frustrated. Can you tell me a little more about why you are feeling this way?

I had a great opportunity to use these yesterday when I was on recess duty. I saw a friend sitting on the curb alone, hood pulled up over his head and covering his face. I went over to see what was up, and I had the opportunity to make a new friend.

Now, I'm going to go out on a limb and say that this friend, if he were in my classroom, would probably be the friend who tries to see what buttons he could push. I'm guessing he stretches the rules as far as he possibly can, and I also learned (because he told me) that he can respond to his teachers in a pretty reactive way and probably can be, in his words, "yeah, a little disrespectful." So I get why he had a parent phone call coming his way.

At the same time, I met a very well spoken 4th grade for somebody who was able to rattle off the 7 different schools he's attended in his very short school career. I met a young man with an amazingly confident handshake, and he looked me right in the eyes when he did it. I met a young man who was able to tell me that he was mad that he got in trouble because his dad didn't sign something. I met a young man who felt like he didn't have any friends. And I met a young man who, it seemed, just wanted somebody to listen to how he was feeling.

I talked with him about trying to be more proactive and not so reactive when talking with his teacher and when doing things in the classroom. I'm not sure that will help - he seems like he has a pretty strong will. 

I also told him that if he ever just needed somebody to talk to, he could always come and talk to me. I may not always agree with him, but he could be sure that I would always listen.

Words matter.

Relationships matter.

First Month Reflection

When we last left off, I had shared about my amazing first day of school. It truly was one of the best, and I'm thrilled to report that things have continued to go just as well as they did the first day. While I can't say that everything is all unicorns and rainbows, things just feel different this year. I want to share some of the reasons why these first few weeks have been so successful.

• Using the four categories to plan my days and taking the time to establish routines:
• In my last post, I talked about establishing four categories to guide my first weeks of school. I ended up sticking with these categories for the first three weeks of school. 
• I slightly tweaked the management category to include training for our two student led stations. I spent about a week helping the kids learn how to be independent. We created a chart similar to those I did with the Daily 5 when I taught ELA classes, and we used Freckle, Exact Path (which I am excited to be piloting), and Study Island during this time. That made it an extra opportunity to practice some of our tech boot camp skills.
• We also spent about a week and a half learning how to work effectively in collaborative groups. A lot of our conversations focused on socialization vs collaboration and being willing to accept help or constructive criticism. During this time we used Week In Math activities from YouCubed to start developing the mathematical mindset I'm hoping to grow in the kids this year.
• Teaching and living the 7 Habits
• Since we are beginning to implement the Leader in Me program this year, I have been living the 7 habits in my life, and it truly has changed the way I interact with my students. Yesterday we had another fantastic training, and I'm looking forward to moving beyond just using the words with my classes and focusing on the principles.
• I always made the effort to make positive communication at the beginning of the year, but I always dropped the ball when things got busy and didn't keep it up. I am making this positive communication a priority this year.
• While hard conversations are never fun, my new learnings are helping me make these difficult contacts less challenging. I've stopped taking them personally and see them for what they are: ways to help my kids grow.
• Having 1:1 chromebooks in my classroom
• Being a teacher with 1:1 resources has made a huge change in my class, simply because of all the time saved in transitions. There's no, "Go down the hall and get your computers," or, "You need to go put the computers back in the cart." Because the kids can keep their computers in their desks and have the most important sites bookmarked, transitions are down to about a minute. It's pretty amazing.
• I am able to give the kids more opportunities to come up with different ways to show their learning.
• We are able to use different tools for formative assessments rather than just a paper pencil test.
• We're continuing to develop our technology skills, and I'm looking forward to the next big step: adding Schoology.
• Having my entire class do their independent station first in the afternoon allows us to meet with every single student individually each day. That's been a great way to learn about the kids and see how they are applying skills we're doing in groups.
• Doing all instruction in small groups
• While I know that I am not technically doing my station rotation model by the book, I am already thrilled with it. Students spend 20 minutes per day in each station.
• Having the opportunity to meet with all of my kids every day in small groups during math instruction has allowed me to see where kids are making mistakes more quickly and talk through misconceptions with them.
• Changing my spiral reviews to mostly small group number talks has allowed me, when not working with individuals, to walk around asking critical thinking questions that I learned about this summer at my Franklin Institute training. This has really helped me feel more like a facilitator than a teacher.

While there are always bumps along the road, I feel like this really has been the best start in my 21 years. I feel happy to come to school each day, and I really am looking forward to seeing how we can continue these routines and grow and adapt them to help the kids be even more successful.

A Great First Day

Every year I think about doing things differently the first week of school, but I'm never really quite sure how to go about it. I always start out with the best of intentions, but in the whirlwind of setting up my classroom, inservice, and open house, I always found myself behind the 8 ball. So I always went to the good old, tried and true beginning of the year activities that I've always gone with. They're safe. They're comfortable. And they're old.

Thankfully, I was able to set up my classroom prior to my surgery, so I had the entire last three weeks to think about how I wanted to start school this year. I had all of my new learnings from the different books I read, so I knew I wanted to add in a type of "tech boot camp" that I had learned in the EduProtocol Field Guide. I also knew that we were going to be learning more about the 7 habits, so I definitely wanted to incorporate more of those activities as well.

Despite all of these new learnings, I found myself still going back to the same activities I had always used. I was trying to fit the old activities into these new frameworks because they were safe, and I knew just how they would go. I had mapped out my plans for the first week, trying to tell myself that I had done something different, when really I was doing the same old thing just with different names.

Yesterday I spent a few final hours at school just make sure everything was ready to go. While I was there, I erased everything I had done in terms of plans. If I really wanted to make a change, I couldn't just take the same thing I had always done and give it a pretty new name. I had to really think about the activities I was doing and see exactly what their purpose was.

One thing that will not change: I am not jumping right into the content that I teach. I spend the first two to three weeks establishing routines and developing community. I know it puts me behind on the pacing guide, but the time I gain during the year makes it totally worth it.

So how did I change it up? I followed these steps:

• Establishing Categories - I sat down and thought about the things that I really wanted to or had to accomplish this week. When I really thought about it, I ended up with four main categories:
• School Needs - fire drill practice and school wide stations to learn about the school since it's our 4th graders' first year at Bear Creek
• Management - setting up binders and folders, morning and dismissal routines, lockers, and how to use your agenda
• Community / Habits - getting to know you activities, our class mission statement, setting up the classroom so it works for us, learning the 7 habits and how they fit in our classroom
• Tech Bootcamp - learning all about our new Chromebooks, setting up guidelines, Schoology, Google Suite, and any other activities we'll be doing
• Examining Activities - After I had the categories, I looked through my beginning of the year information and picked out the items for school needs and management. Next, I went through all of those beginning of the year activities that I have always used. I wanted to see if they actually fit into any of these new categories. While many of them did, some (and it pained me to put them to the side) just did not serve a purpose as I looked at my new classroom. Rather than spending that time simply because it's what I've always done, I tabled those activities for others that better met my needs.
• One really helpful step during this process was looking at each of my ice breakers and community building activities. If they fit with one of the 7 Habits, I kept it. If not, it was one of the tabled activities.
• Making A Plan - One thing that I've always done is plan WAY too much for the first two weeks. I always feel rushed because I'm trying to get to everything, and I'm sure that not much sinks in. So I decided to try something totally different. 
• First, I mapped out the beginning of the year school stations that were scheduled for me. Those items, along with lockers, took care of my school needs.
• Next I looked at the management issues that needed to be completed so I could do my ice breaker / community building activities. These activities included setting up our math and leadership binders, setting up our science folders and journals, and learning how to use our agendas.
• Then I added in the community building activities that fit with the 7 habits. I chose one activity each day, a daily reflection, and a weekly reflection so that we could get right into that routine.
• Finally, I thought about what we needed to learn in order to be successful with our new Chromebooks. I picked one of these activities each day to get the kids using technology.

We will be doing at least one activity from each of those four categories each day throughout the first week of school. 

Following this plan helped me have one of the most successful first days of school I can remember in the last 21 years. I didn't feel rushed, I felt like everything we were doing set the groundwork for my classroom goals, and I was able to help the kids see the purpose behind each activity. I cannot wait to see how the rest of the week goes!

Building Bridges

bridge

a: a structure carrying a pathway or a roadway over a depression or obstacle (such as a river)

a bridge connecting the island to the mainland

b: a time, place, or means of connection or transition

building a bridge between two cultures

According to Merriam-Webster, those are the first two definitions of the word bridge. While this post was inspired by a picture of the first definition, I'd like to focus on the second.

Getting divorced isn't easy. While the actual process I went through was simple compared to many, the process of looking at yourself, seeing what you did wrong or could have done better, and then trying to figure out who you are and what your new life should look like... well, all of that is really hard.

It's been four years. Four years this week that I said I wasn't happy and was told that it didn't matter, he wasn't going to change. Three of those years I worked closely with a counselor, and this last year I've been doing a lot of reading, listening, and learning on my own to finally get to the place where I wanted to be. Some people have said to me that I must have had an awful summer, what with my foot being broken and having to have major surgery. But actually, this summer was one of the best. It was an amazing bridge. It allowed me to really focus on myself and learn and apply many of the strategies that I had been hearing and seeing in all of these great resources.

Then Wednesday and Thursday happened. Our school is beginning to implement the Leader in Me program, and it's a very interesting training process. Before you implement the program with the kids, you learn how to live the seven habits in your own life. Rather than being a bridge, my two days of training were really the bow that tied up and connected all of the puzzle pieces I had been collecting the last few years. Everything made so much sense, and, next to our opening day a few years ago, this was the best inservice I have ever attended.

The bridge that inspired me during this training appeared in a video about win-win situations. It is a bridge called The Bridge of Aspirations, and it connects the Royal Ballet School of London with London's Royal Opera House where the Royal Ballet practices and performs. The students in the school are reminded all of the time of their purpose and goals simply by seeing and walking across this bridge. They can see exactly where all of their hard work will lead them.

I got to thinking about this Bridge of Aspirations, and I wondered how many schools are actually creating Bridges of Dread instead of the bridges that show how students can achieve their dreams. These bridges are paved with things like:

• You have to have lots of homework this year so we can get you ready for next year.
• If you do that next year, you're going to get detention or be suspended.
• Your (insert grade level teacher) next year isn't going to put up with that.
• You're going to be very embarrassed if you're still acting like that next year.

I know the list can go on. I've said some of these myself, and I'm so disappointed. Instead of setting my students up to cross a bridge of aspirations, I'm setting them up for fear, worry, and anxiety by painting the next school year and the next year's teachers as some awful place with awful people. What I should really be focusing on is: 

• how our skills this year will help them next year. 
• how their choices now will help them develop skills they can use as they get older and the choices get harder.
• the fact that developing courage and consideration will help them solve problems and work with others effectively, no matter how old they are. 
• understanding how important mistakes are to learning, and how important fixing mistakes is to growing.

This list can go on, too. The point is we need to stop building bridges of dread for our kids and for ourselves. 

We need to focus on building bridges of aspiration so that when our kids leave us, they are ready to learn and grow from whatever lies ahead. 

And when we come to those inevitable challenges in our lives, we know we have the strength to go forward and face whatever happens to be on the other side of that bridge.

Living the Dream

A few weeks ago I was talking to my friend as she was helping her son move into his first apartment.  It's a big step for any young person, but even more so because he was getting ready to begin his job working for the NFL. It was an exciting and difficult day for her, and, not being a mom, I could only imagine how she was feeling. As she expressed how difficult and emotional it was, I said the only thing I could think of:

I can’t imagine how hard this is. But how many moms can say that their child is living their dream! How amazing is this?

It’s true. How many people settle for whatever comes along instead of pursuing something they have always dreamed of doing? She had raised a young man who didn't settle, and here he was. He was about to begin living his dream!

As I was thinking about the start of the school year with our first day of inservice today, I realized that my mom could say the same thing. I wanted to be a teacher for as long as I could remember. And my brother, now a coast guard instructor pilot (formerly a search and rescue pilot) always wanted to fly. And here we both are, living our dreams for over 20 years. 

I wouldn’t say it’s been easy or what I had expected, but it was my dream. So this year, instead of saying that summer went too fast or that I’m disappointed to be back, I’m going to remember that I am one of those lucky people to be living my dream. And I’m going to make sure that I make the best of it.

Pay Attention to Details

My kids get sick of my saying, "Mathematicians and scientists pay attention to details!" But it's the rallying cry in our classroom.

We pay attention to details so that we can work with each other effectively.

We pay attention to details so we observe what's happening in the world.

We pay attention to details so we can hypothesize why things are happening.

We pay attention to details so we can figure out how to tackle a problem.

We pay attention to details so we can find our mistakes and then fix them.

We pay attention to details so we can learn more about topics that are our passions.

The list could go on and on.

But as I sit here in the midst of a summer that's not going quite the way I envisioned it, I wonder if I teach my kids to pay enough attention to the details of themselves. Does any teacher pay attention to their own details? Do we take good enough care of ourselves? Do we pay enough attention to the details when things don't seem right, or do we just brush them to the side and figure things will be okay?

I can definitely tell you that I was a hard core brusher. If something didn't seem right with me, I would brush it to the side. I would keep myself busy. I would ignore it. I always just figured that everything would get better, and usually it did. But over the last few years, I've been trying to take better care of myself, and rather than brushing off those little details that didn't seem quite right, I'm trying to pay more attention to them.

If I'm tired, I rest so I don't become exhausted. If I start to feel stuffy or sneezy, I take steps to keep that cold or whatever funk it might be from taking hold. That doesn't mean I'm not still a brusher, but I'm getting better at paying attention to those little details. And you should, too.

We really don't spend the time taking care of ourselves like we should. We often put everybody else ahead of us, but I'm here to say that it's time to start paying attention to YOUR details. If something doesn't feel right, trust your gut and get it checked. What are some of these details I'm talking about?

• Check your skin. If there's something that doesn't look right, have a dermatologist remove it.
• Ladies and gents, do those self exams. A lump might be nothing, or it might be something. Get it checked.
• When you hit the right age, get yourself a colonoscopy. Thanks to my family history, I've now had two. It is NOT that bad. This time around I had two high risk, precancerous polyps removed. Getting a colonoscopy is WAY easier than dealing with the cancer that could result if you don't.
• If you're having pain, it's not being weak to see a doctor and figure out where it's coming from. Nobody should have to suffer; not for a week, a month, a year, or for any time.
• Get your eyes checked. If you're playing trombone to try to read something, it's time.
• It's not just your physical body. If you're not feeling well emotionally, it's okay to talk to somebody. Talking with my amazing counselor was one of the biggest steps I took to help me heal, grow, and move on from my divorce.

I'm certainly no doctor. But I have finally realized that if we don't pay attention to our own details and take care of ourselves, we can't be good wives, husbands, friends, or teachers. So if you haven't been doing it, please take the time to pay attention to YOUR details. You are definitely worth it.

Being Told You Can't

A few years ago, I went to a music trivia night with my friend. My friend is a music junkie and has a knack for remembering songs and artists from all different genres. While I love and appreciate music and have played the clarinet since I was 9, remembering song titles and the artists who sing them isn't one of my strengths.

While I can't remember whether we won or lost that night, the one thing that has stuck with me for four years is how I felt. My partner, my friend, discounted my answers, she used her own because I didn't know what I was talking about, and she made me feel bad when we did use my answers and they were incorrect. I can't remember the exact words she used, but that feeling has kept me from attending other music trivia nights on purpose. And even when I did happen to be in an establishment when one was going on I didn't participate at all or try very hard if I did participate because I knew I was really bad at it.

Hellllllooooooo, fixed mindset.

Fast forward to a few weeks ago when we accidentally ended up at a music trivia night with friends. We joined in, but in my head I was thinking, "I really suck at this." To my surprise, I helped get a few of the answers. Go me! We went back last week, and I managed to get a few more correct answers. Last night...... let me tell you about last night. I'm not one to brag, but I kicked butt last night, particularly in the "Mash Up" round. The object of the round was to name the two songs that were mixed together and the two artists. I was also able to get the "Final Jeopardy" round as well. My team didn't win, but it didn't matter. The feeling I felt was (and still is) hard to put into words. After four years of believing I was a failure, I was successful! I felt like I was an important asset to my team! I had accomplished something I didn't think I could do!

How many times do our words and our actions make our kids feel like I have felt for the last four years?

We constantly "tell" our kids that they are "bad readers" by making them go to clinics to do more reading.
We don't give them a chance to fix mistakes on tests, leading them to believe that mistakes are bad and they aren't good enough.
We keep them in from recess to review information they didn't understand on a test.
We consistently look for areas of weaknesses and plan our instruction around that.

I know this list is just a tip of the iceberg, and I know that 99% of these actions are either products of the system or just how schools work. But despite the fact that we do not mean to make kids feel like they are failures, how often do we do just that? How often do we focus on what kids can't do instead of focusing on what they can do.

This is something I have thought about often, and I may have even written about it here before. But it never really impacted me so personally until last night. I know that there are things that I cannot change, but I need to do my best to find all of the things that I can change. For four years, I felt like a failure at something simply because of what another person did, and I need to make sure that I am never that person for any of my students.

Learning at the Franklin

Yesterday I had the amazing opportunity, thanks to our local intermediate unit and a STEM grant they received, to attend a professional development session at The Franklin Institute in Philadelphia. The official title of the session was Demystifying Maker Spaces at the Franklin Institute, and I was completely stoked to have the opportunity to learn at the museum since I had never actually been there.

I went in having a lot of preconceived ideas about what the day would be about, and the biggest one was that we would be taking a look at how to set up a special space, the materials we need, and the things that the kids would create while they were there. I was also looking forward to seeing how the instructors connected this idea of a makers space in a museum with something that I could actually do back at school.

Boy was I wrong.

The day ended up being a big affirmation of what I've already been doing in our classroom during our clinic time, but I've been calling it Genius Hour. Imagine my surprise when the instructor even started the hands on part of our learning exactly the same way I start clinic with my kids: by showing Caine's Arcade! After watching the video and brainstorming everything we knew about different type of arcade games, we were split into groups. Each group was assigned to a different part of the museum, and our mission was to use that section of the museum to inspire our own arcade game. My group was assigned to Space Command, and we were off to see what we could find. We ended up with Solar System Shootout, and it was a lot of fun to create the project.

Each planet was worth a different amount of points based on its size

Once again, while getting the affirmation that I was on the right track was great, I wondered what new learning I would end up getting that I didn't bring with me on the bus. But as I reflect back on the day I realize that the experience gave me a lot to think about.

First, I was reminded once again that how you group kids (or adults) is extremely important. We were assigned to groups randomly with a dot on our name tags. While my group of 3 worked well together, I don't think we were comfortable enough with each other to have challenging discussions. I also was a little disappointed that my teammates weren't as eager to explore the museum after we finished in our assigned section as I was. Once again, I realized the importance of establishing a strong community in my classroom before jumping into projects like this.

Second, I learned how to be a more effective facilitator for my kids. This past year I played more of a hands off role, observing and helping when kids asked for help. Now I know that in order for the kids to be hands on and minds on, I need to be more active by following four steps:

• Asking opening ended questions: Why did you do that? What were you thinking? Why do you think that happened? Would you change anything? What challenges did you experience? What were your successes? 
• Encourage critical thinking - asking the open ended questions forces the kids to think critically and allows me to see the learning they need or they are getting
• Cultivate a rich dialogue - giving individuals or groups the opportunity to share their ideas WHILE they are working, instead of just when they are finished, allows for kids to practice discussions, making suggestions, and accepting constructive criticism
• Make connections - showing kids how their actions are like the work of real scientists or other workers in the real world

While I was thrilled to learn how to be a better facilitator, there was one other quote that really stuck with me. 

A makers space isn't so much a place or a thing that you make. It's a mindset that you have.

Let that sink in a second. Learning can be informal. The kids can direct the learning. The process is more important than the product. Reflection is important. There are multiple ways to solve a problem. It's okay to fail. We can learn a lot by listening to each other. 

We've been so worried about having a special room and finding the right materials, but really, it's not about that at all. The key to a makers space is all about having a different mindset. And thanks to my learning, I'm excited to continue to grow this mindset in my classroom.

Too Much Time on My Hands

If you're not already singing this, then clearly you aren't nearly as old as I am. Or maybe it's just that you haven't heard the magic of Styx. Either way, let's start off with a little music to get your toes tapping!

You can thank me later for that ear worm.

But seriously, having a lot of time on your hands can be a blessing or a curse. For me it's been a blessing because I'm doing a ton of reading and learning since the whole broken foot thing has the rest of my activities relatively limited. I have a little notebook where I've been taking notes on all of the great ideas I've learned in books, from blog posts, and from Twitter. My mind is racing with all of these ideas and resources and how they might look in my classroom this coming year.

But all of that learning can also be a curse. Because let's be honest. Once I learn something and get excited about it, then of COURSE I need implement it in my classroom. Anything else would be a waste of all of that wonderful learning. But today, I had a little aha moment as I was thinking about all of the things that I already have written in my notebook and all of the ideas racing around in my mind.

I can't do it all.

If I try to do it all, I am going to feel like I'm not doing anything well.

If I try to do it all, I'm going to feel like I'm failing.

If I try to do it all, I'm going to give up.

I'm not sure if any of you are like me, but this is a pretty big realization. I tend to push myself -- okay, I push myself, and I'm super hard on myself when I don't think I'm doing things the way I believe they should be done. So putting the brakes on today was a pretty huge step for me, and now I need to think about my new learnings through a different lens. I'm thinking about what exactly will be happening this year:

1. I know that I am going to have a cart of Chromebooks for my classroom to begin piloting our 1:1 program.

2. I know that I started dabbling in the station rotation model at the end of last school year, and I loved how it felt. 

3. I know that I am expected to start using Schoology in preparation to teach my colleagues how to use it as we move to a 1:1 school.

Just those three things are a monumental task for one school year because within the idea of the 1:1 program and the personalized learning that comes with the station rotation model, there are lots of activities to adjust and technology to learn. Rather than continuing to pile on the new learnings and new ideas, I really need to focus on being successful (or failing forward) with these three things so that I can reach my goal for student success and personalized learning and help my colleagues feel confident and successful as they begin to implement personalized learning in their classrooms.

I hope if you have too much time on your hands this summer that you learn many wonderful things, but you remember that you don't have to do all of them in your classroom. Being really successful with one or two meaningful changes can make a much bigger impact than trying to do a lot of things halfway.

Focus On the Positives

Have you ever noticed that, for some reason, we focus way more on the negatives than the positives? This is an image that I've seen a few different times, and it always impacts me the same way.



That's me. I've been there. Often.

We focus on the traffic lights that turn red instead as we approach them instead of cheering for the lights that turn green or are green during our trip.

We grumble about the long line at the grocery store, but we don't cheer when the cashier opens their register and asks if they can help us.

We become impatient when we have to wait on hold, but we don't cheer when somebody answers our call almost immediately.

We get annoyed when the dogs stay out and putz around when we're in a hurry, but we don't cheer them on as much as we should when they come right away when we call.

We are sad when one person forgets our birthday, even when 175 others take the time out of their day to acknowledge us.

We make our kids spend extra time on things they don't do well at, like reading, instead of letting them participate in activities like band or orchestra where they excel.

At some point we need to start cheering for the good things, no matter how small.

At some point we need to be thankful for all that we have that is good.

At some point we need to focus on kids' (and adults') strengths and not on their weaknesses.

At some point we need to focus on the positives because those are all of the good things that make life special.

Two Steps Forward

I've been thinking a lot about how I want to continue to transform my classroom this year based upon the learning I'm doing this summer. After hearing Bob Dillon speak at our closing session of the school year, I was motivated to change my classroom space, something that I had been pondering for a few months. The book, Blended, has helped me set a goal, which I'm still refining, and determine that a combination of the station rotation model and the flex model would be the best blended learning styles to help me and my students reach our goal.

Now I'm on the to the book The Eduprotocol Field Guide by Marlena Hebern and Jon Corippo. This book describes various lesson frames that you can use to teach kids content and skills throughout the year. While I'm not anywhere near finishing the book, I especially appreciate their chapters on Smart Starts: using the first few weeks of school to establish culture and routines as opposed to jumping right into the curriculum. While some of my colleagues disagree with me, this idea of starting smart is something that I have been doing for a while now, and it was a nice affirmation to see it discussed in an in depth manner in this book.

In addition to the affirmation, I've already learned something that I can use to help me transform my classroom, and I feel should have been a no brainer. In addition to the Smart Starts they also recommend using that time at the beginning of the year to do a Tech Boot camp. Front load the year with an introduction to all of the technology you'll be using in your classroom so that they kids have the background they need to explore, be creative, and be successful throughout the year. Seriously. Why did I not think of this?

Finally, like any good book, it's also making me question things. The first quote that caught my eye was, "Parallel learning is no longer the appropriate model for classrooms." And then a little while later I read, "... this natural creativity has been steadily decreasing since 1990, with the most significant losses by third grade despite increases in IQ." Those two quotes made me think back to a school visit our group did to the Lampeter Strasburg School District. This visit was the key to help me change the instruction in my classroom this year, and something one of our hosts said really stuck with me. As we were touring the middle school our one host said something along the lines of, "We don't want the kids to take a step backwards with their learning experiences; we want them to keep moving forward." Now, our guide was speaking in terms of 1:1 opportunities and explaining when they went up from middle school and then back down to the elementary school. They didn't want the kids to have the opportunities for a blended learning experiences but then go back to a traditional learning experience. But really, this statement could apply to anything from changing your classroom space, offering students more choice, giving them opportunities to fix mistakes, and giving students flexibility in how they move through the content.

As I read the quotes in the book, I thought about the kids who were in my class last year, the upcoming school year, and my new students. Last year's kids had the opportunity for a second take on their assessments because we were learning the value of mistakes. What if they don't have that same opportunity this year? This year's students will have the opportunity to learn in a blended classroom when they are with me, but they will be in a mostly traditional setting in their other class. They will likely also be in a traditional setting in 5th grade. How will that impact their learning? I am spending a lot of time focusing on the 4Cs and having a growth mindset rather than test taking skills and passing the PSSAs. Will this carry over as successful experiences for my students, or will the skills not transfer and put them behind the learning curve?

While I am excited to transform my classroom, and while I have much respect for all of my coworkers as caring professionals, I can't help but wonder if the haphazard way we are implementing things at our school will cause our students to move two steps forward and then one step back with every transition they make.

Thinking about Mental Health

Each summer my district provides online professional development opportunities. Taking these courses results in a trade day, or a day off during the school year. I always enjoy the opportunities that we are provided, and this year I selected a course on blended learning and a course on mental health issues. Along with growth mindset concepts, understanding the mental health issues my students are facing is very important to me, so I was very interested to see what I would learn through this course.

The course focused on depression, anxiety, eating disorders, psychosis, and conduct disorders. There were some great videos incorporated into the course, and while I enjoyed all of them (some of them were videos that I had already watched previously on my own), I really enjoyed one that I ended up with by accident. It was one of those "since you watched this video, here's another one for you to check out," videos that starts playing automatically when the first one ends. It's called Everything you Thought you Knew about Addiction is Wrong by Johann Hari, and if you have a few minutes to spare, I would definitely check it out. It gave me a lot to think about in terms of the environment we are creating for all of our students who make mistakes.

I think the simple fact is that we are teachers, we're not medical professionals. The best that we can hope to do is provide a connected, caring, safe environment for our students so they are okay with making mistakes and okay with being themselves. We need to speak up when we believe something is wrong, and we need to advocate for our kids who are struggling in any capacity. And we need to keep advocating until we are blue in the face.

The psychosis section of this course really impacted me because it reminded me of a student I had many years ago. I had the opportunity to have this young man for two years as part of a 3rd / 4th grade looping class and then for a 3rd year as part of a 4th / 5th grade multi-age program. This boy was what I liked to call a squirrel. Always darting from here to there, always finding something different to think about or do, and he kept me on my toes. I had the opportunity to see him grow the first two years, and while he needed constant reminders the potential for success was always there. During those first two years, he father suffered from, and eventually passed away from, a difficult and debilitating liver disease. After losing his father I worried about it, but as is the norm, I sent him off for summer vacation and hoped for the best.

When this young man came back, he was a different boy. He repeatedly shared stories about the bigger, bad kids in the neighborhood and the really bad stuff that they did. Unfortunately, I never was able to get the details about what that "really bad stuff" was, but I passed his comments on to our guidance counselor in the hopes that she might be able to find out something that I couldn't. It was around this same time that he started acting out and stealing things. When I became more vocal with my concerns, I was told that he had always been that way, I was just too nice and hadn't been strict enough. And clearly he had always been stealing stuff, but I had just never caught him doing it when he was in my room all the time. I knew this young man had changed, and I knew he needed help. But the louder I squawked the less people listened. And so began a long line of disciplinary problems and consequences issued.

This young man went on to have significantly more serious behavior problems in middle school. I don't believe he ever ended up graduating. And a few years ago I got the sad news that he had committed suicide while incarcerated in our local prison.

When we talk about mental health issues and getting students the support that they need, he is my failure. I don't know what else I could have done, but what happened to this young man will haunt me forever. As we try to educate ourselves about the mental health issues that are affecting our kids today, I can only hope that we will figure out the answer to helping our kids before it's too late.

Nothing Better to Do

After three short days I'm already finding that being in a walking boot really stinks. A mysterious stress fracture has me confined to this torture device for at least the next three weeks, and nothing is easy. Everything that I have to do takes longer, and everything that I was excited to start doing once school was out is out of the question.

Since I have "nothing better to do" with my time, why not look at school stuff?

Isn't that how we look at a lot of things? Since I have nothing better to do why not do this task instead of, YES! I finally have the time to sit and think about this! The fact is that I had such a great year, I'm actually energized and excited to keep learning. (Go ahead, insert the nerd emoji here. I wear it proudly!) While I wanted absolutely nothing to do with school last summer and just needed a break from everything remotely related to school, this year is different. So, since my hiking, walking the dog, going to the gym, and kayaking time have all been reduced to zero, it makes sense that I would follow my other passion: learning!

During the year our school's 1:1 implementation team started reading the book Blended: Using Disruptive Innovation to Improve Schools by Horn and Staker. We read the first two chapters together as a group and used them as a jumping point for our visitations and 1:1 implementation work. But now that I have so much time on my hands, I figured I'd keep going and see what else I can learn.

I've already settled on the fact that we are not going to be disruptive innovators. We had a great opportunity to do just that at our school in the upcoming year and passed up that opportunity. So that got me thinking, "Why exactly is my school going 1:1 in the next few years?" Besides the fact that it's the latest thing to do. Besides the fact that we all now how Schoology accounts. Besides the fact that it's what everybody is doing. Why are we making this move? I got thinking about this because Chapter 3 in the book talks all about a rallying cry, establishing goals, and looking at the different types of innovation to meet those goals.

As I thought about my own classroom and what my own goal for next year might be, I came up with this first draft:

My goal is to use the hybrid rotational model so that all of my students will show growth during each math unit, on the 4th grade PSSAs, and on their benchmark assessments. The students and I will be responsible for this growth by the end of the year.

I know that's pretty general, but like I said, it's a first draft. And it's what really got me thinking about this whole 1:1 thing because I was able to accomplish this goal this year without 1:1 technology. So obviously there's my first problem: I've already met this goal. Why should it be my goal again this year? Well, the key piece that I added is "the students and I will be responsible." I really want to help my students start becoming the owners of their own learning. I know my kiddos are only 9 or 10, so they aren't going to be able to do everything on their own, and they have a lot to learn. But I want to continue what I achieved this year with growth mindset, making mistakes, and taking charge of their own learning and help my next group of kids become even more successful at following their passions and loving learning.

So now that I have my first draft, I need to start thinking about how I want to up the ante. Is this really the goal I want for my classroom? Will 1:1 technology really help my students become more responsible for their learning? What do I have to do differently to help my kids continue to show growth but also become more responsible for their learning? And what really is our goal for 1:1 technology? 

Hopefully I will be able to figure out the answers to at least some of these questions this summer. And if not, I will at least have fun learning!

Year 20 in the Books

This year was exactly what I needed. Year 19 was hard, really hard, and it made me wonder if I was really supposed to be a teacher any more. Year 20 was the big, giant hug that said, "Yup, this is what you are supposed to be doing."

While I certainly didn't have the challenges I experienced last year, there were definitely still challenges of all shapes and sizes. I was also very nervous because I was teaching a very different group of students than I have ever (and when I say ever, I mean all 20 years ever) taught before. I didn't want to let down those people who asked me to take on that challenge. I was also out many days this year for professional learning, and everybody knows that being out can throw the kiddos and the teachers for a loop.

So what was it about this year that made it so much better? While I'm still reflecting, I have some thoughts on this.

1. We embraced the ideas of having a growth mindset. We really learned about our brains (to the point that one of my kids said, "Well, my amygdala has me feeling really frustrated so I need to take a little break!"), we learned about how we learn, and we worked really hard to find and fix mistakes. It's okay to say it's okay to make mistakes, but if you don't persevere to fix those mistakes then you are missing the point.
2. I gave the kids more control of the classroom. Yes, some of the desk arrangements they came up with made me twitchy, but the arrangements were theirs. I stepped back and let them be in charge in designing our room, picking their seats, and sometimes even choosing how they would show me their learning. It felt really good, and they rose to the challenge, so I want to continue to grow in this area next year.
3. Things bothered me less. I have been on a personal journey to learn more about mindfulness, health, and gratitude. My own personal learning and growth helped me focus on what was really important at school and let the other stuff go. It's also amazing how happiness at home helps you be more productive at school.
4. We were more creative. We designed parks, we built tiny houses, and we made roller coasters. And it wasn't because there was "extra time at the end of the year" or because they were fast finishers. It was because these tasks fit our units and gave the kids meaningful opportunities to collaborate, think critically, and be creative. I did notice that during these opportunities many of my friends struggled when things got hard. They LOVED the projects until they got hard. So that is an area we can continue to work on next year.
5. My professional learning grew and grew. As part of our school's 1:1 planning team, I had the opportunity to take part in a training session and then work with a larger group to see how we could implement what we are learning at our school. Having the opportunity to think differently about learning really opened my eyes and help me grow this year, and I'm excited for the opportunities I will have next year.
6. The kids.

I could go on and on. There's a lot to be thankful for, happy about, and excited about in regards to this year. I am thankful that, even after 20 years, I cried a little after I said goodbye to my kids. I was a little sad when I left my classroom yesterday. And I'm already excited for next year's possibilities.

Yup. This is what I'm supposed to be doing.

Hybrid Rotational Model

During our training for the 1:1 program that's coming to our school in a few years, I had the opportunity to attend a variety of professional development sessions and school visits. During both the sessions and the visits I learned and experienced the hybrid rotational model, so I thought this would be a good place for me to dabble the rest of this year.

I've been trying to do a math workshop model, but after trying assigned daily stations, a math menu, and my own version of a Daily 5 type math, I hadn't found anything that felt right. It seemed that this model was very similar to stations, so I thought I would give it a go. You guys. I'm loving it. So much so that I signed up for a three day training this summer to really develop an understanding of what I'm doing since I know I'm not quite there yet.

The premise of the hybrid rotational model is that the students rotate through three stations: direct, independent, and collaboration. During the independent station, the students get their instruction in the form of a video or some method besides the teacher lecturing (think flipped classroom, but instead of the work happening at home, it just happens before they meet with you). The collaborative station allows the kids to work together on some sort of meaningful, challenging project, and the direct station is where the kids work with you, ideally to practice the skill they learned in the lesson.

It was a comfortable place to start because it seems just like stations or a workshop setting, and it was really easy to get the kids into the flow. When I started, I started in a more traditional way; I did what I would have done in a whole group lesson during the direct session, and then gave the kids work to do during the independent. I know that's not optimal, but it gave me a place to start. Now that I'm getting more comfortable with it, I feel like I may be able to start transition to what it's really supposed to look like.

But here's the thing. Because of a huge time discrepancy and a pretty significant difference in the levels of my classes, I was doing this with my morning group and not with my afternoon group. (I teach math and science to one group of kids in the morning, and then I do the same with a completely different group of kids in the afternoon.) And it felt yucky. I felt yucky because my mornings were amazing. The kids were engaged, I felt like I was REALLY getting to talk with every one of my kids every day, I felt like I knew where my kids were and what my kids needed, and we all were pretty happy. IT FEELS GOOD! So the fact that I hadn't figured out a way to do it with my afternoon kids..... well, it made me feel yucky.

We had PSSAs this week, and I just couldn't bear the thought of doing the same old thing today. So I sat down during my planning and I figured out a way to take my math and science and make it a hybrid rotational model. You'll see I noticed that I added a 4th station to cover our science lesson, so the stations looked like this:

• Independent - complete our ticket out the door for measuring angles, work on the Geometry strand in Front Row (now called Freckle)
• Collaborative - work together to create a Tiny House
• Direct - lesson on polygons, perimeter, and area
• Science - watch a video and take notes on bar graphs, begin working on analyzing data on bar graphs

Before we started this afternoon I was honest with my kids. I told them that the other teachers and I were talking about how we didn't think kids could do anything this afternoon. I told them how we felt like they had "lost it" since we did PSSAs, and they weren't going to be able to do what they needed to do. And then I told my kids how awful I felt thinking that, and I decided to change my mindset and see if they could prove me wrong.

I introduced each station and answered any questions. I reminded the kids that if I was working at the direct station, I couldn't babysit; they had to take responsibility for their own learning. And I assigned each group a leader to be my eyes. Their job was not to boss anybody around. Instead, their job was to ask their teammates what they needed, and they were also asked to report back to me and tell me what I needed to do to help the kids be more successful. 

The students stayed in each station for 20 minutes, and I felt like that was a good amount of time. The kids were able to work on their tasks for the full time, but it gave them the opportunity to transition and move onto something new before they got burned out. My learning support teacher was in for about 1/2 an hour, and she provided support to the different groups while I was doing my direct instruction. I didn't like this part; I need to figure out how to get her involved with the direct instruction even though her schedule only allows her to be in my room for 1 full rotation and 1/2 of the second. I also had an instructional paraprofessional, and when she arrived (after the 1st rotation) she assisted the other three groups with the video and note taking at the science station.

It. Felt. Amazing.

When the last timer went off the kids were like, "Wait? What? It's time to go home already????" They were engaged. They were trying tasks that were REALLY challenging. One of the leaders came to me at the end and said, "The first three stations went great, but the Tiny House - we were just fighting and arguing. I think it's because we really didn't understand it." That was music to my ears because I know what that group, and likely others, needs to be successful.

But you know what really feels good? It doesn't matter that I don't have the same time, and it doesn't matter that my afternoon class may not be at the same level of my morning class. They took charge of their own learning, and they were proud to do so. I have a lot to work through, but the way I see it, if my kids can do this on a Friday afternoon after three days of PSSA testing, they are going to knock it out of the park the rest of the year. I'm so excited, and I can't wait to see what we can accomplish!

Of Empowering Kids and Science Assessments

This year I have really been trying to make my classroom one where kids have choices, options, and a voice in their own learning. Reading the book Empower: What Happens When Students Own Their Learning has helped me see I'm on the right track with many of the things I've been incorporating in my classroom, and it's also given me some ideas of where to go next. Helping my students understand what it means to have a growth mindset has also been a goal of mine this year, and while it's difficult to fit into a pass / fail, take one test, here's your grade system, I'm pretty happy with how I've been incorporating that as well.

So my dabbling here and there lead me to think differently about how I wanted to assess my unit on the scientific process. This year, instead of giving the big, summative assessment, I decided I wanted to take the ideas of student choice and growth mindset and apply them to determine my kids' knowledge of the scientific process. I also wanted to try and get away from the one shot, here's your grade assessment strategy that I so often have to follow. The answer was having my students design and carry out their own experiment following the scientific process.

I have been embedding the idea of the scientific process throughout the year as we have carried out different experiments, so all of my students have had a preview to the steps and the vocabulary we would be using. To examine the parts of the process more closely, we conducted four different experiments, and we worked on writing mini lab reports so the kids could see that writing is a very important part of science.

Along the way both of my classes had the opportunity to participate in the Skype a Scientist program. If you have not heard of this, please, please check it out! Both Alex and Ehren answered my students' questions about what is it like to be a scientist beautifully and with passion! They helped my kids see that experiments are more than just "fun" things you do, and both men are working hard to make a difference in the world.

After building my kids' background knowledge, it was time for them to take charge. I created a mini lab report form, and the first step was for the kids to pick their favorite experiment that we had done in class since the beginning of the year. Just to make it a little easier, I did limit it to four choices:

• evaporation experiment
• the gummy bear experiment
• the food coloring experiment
• the paperclip experiment

Once the kids chose their favorite, they got into groups based on that choice. Depending upon the number of people in the group, the kids could choose small groups to complete their experiment. In the end, between the two classes, I had 12 groups collaborating to design and complete their experiments. 

After going over the rubric (an area where I could get the kids' input -- maybe a goal for next year) the kids were eager to get started, and their first task was to create an short abstract and a shopping list for me. They had to present their idea and get approval before beginning their process. Once they had approval, then it was time to work on each step. The kids collaborated to:

• Share their observations from the original experiment and their background knowledge about their new idea.
• Explain the variable of the original experiment.
• Explain the variable of the new experiment.
• State their research question.
• Determine their hypothesis.
• Come up with a detailed plan.
• Carry out the experiment.
• Analyze the data they collected.
• Draw conclusions about the results.

The kids had as many opportunities as they needed to conference with me about each part of the report and make changes to improve their grade. Some kids were perfectly happy to just score proficient, and others eagerly accepted feedback and worked towards the advanced mark on the rubric. The only step that they kids could not redo was the experiment; because of the sake of time we had to limit it to one shot, but the could explain what they would do differently in their conclusions section.

While it certainly would have been much easier to send home a study guide and give my kids a test one day, assessing my kids' knowledge of the scientific process was so much more beneficial in so many ways.

• Students had the opportunity to practice the basic tenet of having a growth mindset: you have to persevere when things are challenging, and you have to go back and fix a mistake when you make it. That's how our brains grow.
• Students had the opportunity to work on their communication skills, whether it was in their experiment group or sharing their ideas verbally or in writing with me. There were many, many revisions as we went through the process, and nobody ever gave up.
• I got to see exactly where the holes were for my kids and reflect upon how I need to change my instruction next year: I need to give them examples of detailed plans when we do them. I need to do a better job of helping them understand how to analyze data before they have to do it on their own. 
• I got to see exactly where my kids' learning was right on track. They really understand that there can only be one variable in an experiment, and they did a great job using the tools to measure and collect data. 

While I originally intended for this process to end with the students turning in their reports, an unexpected little twist popped up. As I was sharing pictures of their work on twitter, a friend who teaches in California tweeted back. After a few messages, we decided that my students would type of their plans and share them with her class so that her students could try and duplicate the experiments and the results. This is such a vital part of scientific discovery, so I am really excited to make this connection and see how it works out.

While it certainly took more time than a test, I saw my students continuing to learn and grow throughout the assessment period, and according to my students, they feel like they understand the scientific process "way better" than they would have and think they will remember it much better, too. I'm hopeful that I can continue to find ways that I can offer the kids some choice and adapt our assessments so kids have the opportunity to showcase their learning and continue to work toward mastery.

One Little Word 2018

I took some time this morning to read back through my posts, and I love sitting here reading the reflections I've done about both teaching and life. At one point, I hoped to be one of those bloggers that everybody read or talked about on Twitter, and I got a bit disenchanted when that didn't happen. So I stopped. But as I look back over what I've written here, I realize that this blog isn't for anybody but me. If others happen to get something from what I share, that's awesome - but that's not the point any more.  

I do a lot of my writing in a journal now, but every now and then I come back here. Maybe I'll start writing more here - who knows. But I wanted to come back and share my one little word, which I have not done in a while. I've been picking a word instead of making resolutions for a bunch of years now, and I really do like it. My last two words have been especially helpful for me.

In 2016 my word was believe. One of the things I learned going through my divorce was that I didn't believe in myself. I didn't believe I was worthy of, well, anything really, and I did believe that I deserved everything that had happened to me. 2016 was a year of growth for me, and I can finally say that I did start to believe in myself. 

In 2017, I chose the word courage because I just wanted to be brave enough to try new things, fail, and continue to believe that I deserved the best. While my amazing counselor was there to help me with many things, the biggest turning point for me was when I stumbled upon a 30 Days of Brave Challenge. Now it's a paid service (of which I am a member - I'm currently working on my 30 Days of Mindfulness), but back when I tried it out it was brand new. Each day I received an activity to try and a journal prompt to reflect and write about. Day 7. It was a life changer. The prompt for Day 7 asked me to think about the movie of my life, and it asked me to rewrite the movie and talk about how the actress would play me. That was the day when I realized that I put myself in the role of victim, and I never let myself out of that role. As the words of my new movie poured onto paper, I realized that I wasn't a victim any more, and the only person who was keeping me there was me. As I closed my journal that day, I felt like a ton of bricks (even more to be quite honest) was lifted off of me, and I think that's when I was finally free of everything. It probably sounds a little selfish or self-centered, but that's the day I started putting myself first instead of constantly trying to make everybody else happy. I wouldn't say that it's been smooth sailing ever since, but it has given me a new found strength to clear the clutter out of my life, see things a little more clearly, and focus on the people and things that truly are important to me.

Now here we are in 2018. I have batted around a few different words: mindful, present, centered, and I thought I had settled on present: seriously - put down the damn phone and be present! But in a surprising little twist just this morning, I decided that my word for 2018 is going to be OPEN. I realized that I'm saying I want things, but then I resist doing those things or letting people into my life. So, this year my goal is to be open to all of the experiences life has in store for me. Yes, I may be afraid. Yes, some of them might be pretty crappy. But I can't live life sitting on the sofa playing games on my phone, reading blog posts, checking Facebook, or looking at emails. I need to be open to the good and the bad because every single experience will give me the chance to learn and grow.

So here's to 2018. May we all be open to every experience life has in store for us, and may we all love, grow, and sprinkle a little good around every, single day.