One Little Word 2020

While my blogging continues to be sporadic at best, I'm choosing to revisit something that I started many years ago - picking a word that will guide me through the upcoming year.

I've picked a lot of important words since I stumbled upon this tradition: growth, opportunity, self, believe, and courage to name a few. They have helped me through some tough times, and they have helped me learn more about myself.

As I was thinking about this year's word, I recognize that, especially in my personal life, I am still struggling with feeling as though I am not good enough and that I am always making mistakes. I pondered making my word enough or confident to help me remember that I am good enough just the way I am and to help me remember that I should be confident with my decisions and my actions because nobody is perfect.

Those words spoke to me, but they didn't really hit the nail on the head for what I was feeling. I thought more about it, and I came up with the words accept and content. Maybe I should focus on accepting myself and things for how they are. Or maybe I should be content with who I am. Those two words kinda hit on feelings I was having, but they still didn't give me that, "Yes! That's the word!" feeling that I was looking for.

I let things simmer for a few more days, and I finally came up with my word for 2020:

Control

Now, that might sound a little bit weird, but here's my thinking. In the past, I have tried to control EVERYTHING, and if I can't control something then I try to interpret the whys behind people's words and actions. I tend to "figure things out" (not really - but figured things out in my own, weird perspective that makes me appear to have messed up in some huge way), blow things way out of proportion, and cause myself all sorts of anxiety instead of just letting things be. Thanks to our 7 Habits training, I already know that the only thing that I'm in charge of is my own personal circle of control, so why not start back at the beginning with Habit 1: Be Proactive and focus on what I can control.

I choose control to help me remember to focus on what I can control, my thoughts and my actions, to remember that others should not have control over me - only I can control myself, and to remember that it's okay if I'm not in control of every situation. It's okay to just let things happen and see where this crazy ride takes me.

So, here's to you, 2020 - the year of focusing on the things I can control and not worrying myself about the rest.